According to Empire magazine The Hurt Locker is "The most literally exciting film you will see this year."

Really? I found it to be the most dull film set in the Middle East I've seen since Jarhead. It's better than Jarhead but only just.

Some of the scenes were interesting but the story was plain boring. Nothing happens.

The team leader was an idiot and my only regret was that he didn't get blown to bits early on so I could be saved from his annoying and selfish messing about. If you aren't going to wear the anti-blast suit then please don't put it on in the first place you moron.

The "sniper battle" was as interesting as a real sniper battle. It involved watching a two groups of people sitting there waiting for the other guy to move. The most exciting bit was one of the characters attempting to find a drink. I was half expecting the next scene to be someone doing their ironing.

The bomb defusal scenes were all the same. They weren't tense because the character trying to defuse them was a twat who was doing everything he could to kill himself and everyone around him.

The only real tension this film generates is the tension you feel wondering when the story is going to start.

There was no point setting the film in Iraq because it could have been set anywhere. In fact they might as well have just set it in LA and made it about a team of emergency plumbers.

It avoided any sort of politics and you can't make a film set in occupied Iraq and avoid the politics of the situation. It left the film without any substance. We know what Iraq looks like. We know what a Humvee looks like. If you aren't going to show us anything else then don't bother.

Rating out of five? Zero.